Love Transformation – 5 things I do to greet change with excitement and confidence
This time next week, I will be married on my honeymoon.
But I am not scared. I am excited! Elated!
If you have been reading and listening to me, you know I have anxiety. Change is not something I handle so well. I have a hard time letting things go. How can I face death of a self with such love and compassion?
Because of the practice I have been creating.
Let me share it with you!
- Reframe! This is a skill I learned from studying as an MSW. (Hello CBT! lol) The first thought I have about change is “Ahhh! No!” This comes from the belief that change is painful and that I will be losing something because of it. By reframing the belief, it becomes: “Change is hard sometimes, but I am gaining so much more through it.” Both statements are true, but they are just different ways of seeing it. The key is to keep doing that reframe anytime that thought pops up. It aids in retraining the brain’s reaction.
- Daily Practice! I talked about using my Spiritual Prayer Journal last week in a blog post. I mentioned how it aids in creating some stability and quiet time for myself. Well it does! And it is amazing how much doing so also helps me to get grounded.
- Clear out your energy! As a reiki master, it amazes me how much a change in our energy can disrupt (or align) our day to day lives. Even with the simple effect of sleeping better, you are ready for more things that come your way. When I don’t get enough sleep, I get irritable and have a harder time seeing the full picture of transformations and changes that occur. But our energy affects so many other things as well! It is quite amazing! Not into reiki? Use essential oils or crystals to help clear out your energy!
- Love yourself! This one is super important! You will always be by your side at all times of the day. You are your greatest resource. By loving yourself as best as you can and showing yourself compassion, you can go far! It has really helped me to let go of mistakes I make through knowing I will always be supported by someone in my life. ME! Try incorporating it into a daily practice by showing yourself love or saying something nice to yourself. Reframing also works here! If you think “Wow. Why am I always such a failure?” Answer yourself “You are not always a failure. Let’s list 5 things you didn’t fail at today.” And make that list! Even it was as simple as when you put your toothpaste on your toothbrush it was so perfect, it looked like it was out of a commercial!
- And finally, please, please, PLEASE, give yourself time to grieve or stress. Above all else, your emotions are valid. And denying them doesn’t help. (Trust me. They like to surprise you later when you least expect it.) So take the time to cry or be angry. This is also part of loving yourself. You need that space, so give it to yourself. And when you are ready, tackle one of the other steps!
It helps that I also love my fiance and that we have a wonderful friendship. 😉
So next week, I will be a married woman facing some of the same challenges, and new ones. And I could not be happier or more confident that I can take them on.
What changes or transformations are you going through? And which of the things above are you going to use to great those changes and transformations with grace, confidence, and excitement? Leave me a comment below!
2 Comments
Elyssa
Thank you for this very inspirational article! Hope it will help me work on my own difficulties!
Resonated Readings
This article comes at such a good time. As you know, we are expecting and so while I was anticipating having some feelings about my changing body I was not expecting for it to manifest the other day in this sense of, “Oh, now I will never experience my body as it would have been throughout the rest of my twenties – as just me.” It seems like such a weird thing to feel but I think is really just a sense of mourning a bit of my maiden aspect, for lack of a better term, as a I make this transition. I’ve really tried to give myself the space to feel and process it but remembering to reframe it will definitely help I think. In fact, that suggestion reminded me of the whole metamorphosis of a caterpillar and I think that’s a beautiful and powerful way for me to own it going forward. Thank you Shelby, you’ve helped me make peace with it even more!