We’ve been talking about the 3 P’s of Pressure, and they can show up in our lives in different ways. But when we are dealing with societal pressure, we can feel dissonant and down. So instead, why don’t you give yourself the recognition you seek? Here’s how we’re doing it.
Recognize Yourself – Dealing with Societal Pressure
I was sitting in the car on my birthday, Kyle ran into the store for a couple essentials. I had the time to sit with myself.
It was my birthday. So why was I feeling grumpy?
I was sipping a smoothie. My Facebook notifications were filled with birthday wishes. Kyle was giving me lots of extra attention. It was a warm sunny day. And I achieved a 5 star island on Animal Crossing. So what was up?
Well, despite all of that – I hadn’t given myself my own validation and recognition.
So I made a decision. I would formally recognize myself for at least 3 things each day in my journal, for 1 week. At the end of that week, I would review how it went.
The Recognition Challenge and Dealing with Societal Pressure
Day One –
It went well. I felt a little better.
Day Two –
I really dove in. I went from – “Your makeup looks cute today” on Day One to “You have done so well with saving and putting away money. I am so proud of you. I know you are feeling anxious about buying a new phone and it is okay. You are exercising patience. And it will all work out in your favor. I love you.”
Day Three –
I got a little distracted, but I came back and finished my recognitions! Plus, I gave myself an extra one for handling my husband falling asleep and burning pizza, really well! (And let me tell you, it was REAL burnt. lol)
Day Four –
I took a nap before doing my recognitions. So a little pat on the back there for not pressuring myself to get them done. And then I incorporated a little affirmation about trusting myself. This is when I realized that I sometimes struggle a little with what to give myself recognition for. You may find yourself struggling with it too sometimes. It is okay to recognize ourselves for things that seem small to ourselves – like taking a nap. We are still building the muscle and sometimes those small things don’t get seen. So see them and recognize yourself for doing them. Don’t take that for granted.
Day Five –
Writing on Day Five helped me to realize, I seek recognition, a lot of times, for my work. For things I “do.” This goes back to that pressure of productivity and producing. While many times, we will produce without an aim because of the pressure – we also want the product at the end to bring us recognition or for our hard work to be “worth it.” And just to be recognized for the hard work – so we receive that energy back. We put all our energy into the work and recognition gives us some of that energy back. For myself, a low-energy cutie, that recognition makes the sacrifice worth it. So, while I had set out to give myself recognition – it was also becoming a journey of recognizing how much pressure I put on myself.
Day Six –
I recognized myself for doing a really good job despite being a bit tired and frustrated. And while we never need permission to rest, sometimes our brains need us to. So that is what I did! I told myself to give myself some rest before finishing my recognition’s with fun things like client feedback and seeing changes in my skin from caring for it.
Day Seven –
I again recognized myself for doing a good job with working and getting things done. As an entrepreneur there isn’t a boss or manager to recognize you. You are the boss. And for me, it has become important for me to give that recognition to myself and find ways to honor myself for it. Recognizing myself also became something of playing. It has become more fun over time and something to be silly with. It has become not just a way to give myself recognition but to also engage in play – something we very much need.
Looking Back –
It has been a little bit, a month and a half, since I challenged myself to give myself recognition rather than seek it elsewhere as much. And I feel less frustrated when people don’t see my achievements or how hard I worked on something.
And a lot about my life has changed in this time. My husband and I are getting ready to move. My client load has increased. And while I still have difficult days, I don’t tend to feel as pushy or frustrated – you know, those days where you feel stuck and you just want to physically push things so you can get through but there isn’t anything to physically get out of your way? Those have been less, and when they happen, they aren’t as difficult.
Instead of dealing with societal pressure, I just don’t feel the pressure as much. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still there – but it isn’t as heavy.
I Challenge You!
I challenge you to give this a try! Give yourself recognition and validation on 3 things and do it everyday for a week. Keep track in your journal or in a notes document. Then check back in after a few days or weeks at the end. How did it go?
And if you are doing this challenge on Instagram – tag us!! We want to see it! Use #smliving and you may see your post featured in our stories and highlights!