ShelbyMelissa's Guide to Building a Relationship with Your Deck

Sometimes when we get a new deck, we just don’t click right away. If you are in this situation, you may be wondering, “How can I build a relationship with my deck?” But don’t worry. I’ve got you covered with my Guide to Building a Relationship with Your Deck!

ShelbyMelissa’s Guide to Building a Relationship with Your Deck

Looking to build a relationship with your new deck? Or have one that you just couldn’t seem to work with? Here are some ideas!

Drawing a Card a Day (Alternatively a Spread a Day)

One of the most common pieces of advice is to simply draw a card every day. Not only is this for learning the cards, but it can also aid in building a relationship. Alternatively, you can draw more than just a single card. You can draw for different spreads each day if you want. I would probably recommend against asking the same question of the same spread each time. This is highly repetitive. Just as if you were building a relationship with a person, you wouldn’t talk about the same exact thing every time you saw them. People get bored. For me, decks are not that different. Try switching it more often.

Sleeping with the Deck

This is another common piece of advice. Typically, it is advised to put the deck under your pillow. You can do that if you want, but I recommend actually cuddling the deck. Let it rest against your skin. I have slept with many decks in my bed as well as cuddling a deck. If you are worried about rolling over and hurting the deck, you don’t have to do this. This is only one suggestion.


Sleeping with the deck not for you? Try just shuffling the deck. You can be watching tv, reading a book, waiting for tumblr to refresh, etc. Don’t worry about asking questions or drawing cards; just sit with your cards and shuffle!

Do Something Nice for Your Deck

Sometimes, just doing something nice for your deck can help to create that bond. Make, or purchase, a nice box for your deck. Wrap it in some beautiful fabric or make, or purchase, a beautiful bag for your deck. Store your deck nicely rather than tossing it on the floor. Store it with some crystals or herbs. Wrap it in a scented scarf. There are many ways to do something nice for your deck!

Talk to it (Alternatively Yell at it)

Sometimes decks just need a good talking to. Sometimes decks just need to be yelled at a little. For me, this is a last resort. If you are more comfortable with it, then go for it! Just remember, much like asking repetitive questions, decks probably don’t like to be yelled at so much. This could cause some further issues that you may not be prepared for.
Good luck! And feel free to respond with ways that you bond with your decks!

Other resources that may be helpful:
– My 10 Tips for Reading Tarot
– What is Intuition?

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