I overdrafted my bank account. Dun dun dun! I know. In this episode, number 47 of the Money Mindset Shift, we are digging into what happened, how I shifted through it, and the lessons you can take from my experience!
I think we first need to give context to this episode. This wasn’t the first time I’ve overdrafted my bank account. But it was the most recent.
So what happened? Bills were due, and I forgot that insurance was supposed to be coming out as well. It is on auto payment, so I wasn’t really keeping track of it. I was in “set it and forget it mode.”
After paying bills, and the forgotten insurance payment coming out – my account was overdrawn by something like $5. I forget the exact amount, but I believe it was under $20, and something closer to 0 than 20. So again, something like $5.
I felt so many things when I got that text from my bank letting me know that my account was overdrawn. Mostly shame though.
“How could I make such a mistake?” “I should have been tracking better.” “What am I going to do?” You know, all of those things that cycle through your brain.
Fortunately, I knew I could ask my parents for help. So I did. But I had to deal with the feelings of embarrassment and shame.
“At 32, I shouldn’t be asking my parents for help.” “I should have this together.” Again, all of those “really helpful thoughts” (note the sarcasm there).
My parents, are parents, but also kind and understanding. I called each of them, explained the situation, what I was feeling, and asked each of them to transfer me just a little bit of money. While the overdraft was only something like $5, I wanted to make sure there was a buffer. They were more than happy to help and reassure me.
Quick note, they are divorced and have been for some time, hence, calling them separately.
I also called my grandmother to process. She has always been supportive and warm. So she was just one more person who I was able to be like “hey, this is what happened” and she could provide the “I love you. I understand you feel this way. But also, it is okay.”
And while I was still feeling upset (totally understandable, right?), I wasn’t so down on myself by this point. So let’s review the lessons!
- Overdrafts happen. Mistakes happen. And that is okay. And mistakes don’t mean anything about you. You aren’t a bad person. You aren’t a failure. And you still deserve all of the things you deserved prior to the mistake – compassion, care, etc.
- Reach out. You can journal, and I do encourage it. But humans are also communal beings. For the most part, we need other people. And we seek their approval. So if you have people that you trust and who care about you, reach out to them.
- Journaling. We talk about this a lot, but you can definitely apply the Evaluate, Shift, Heal method here. Evaluate how you are feeling, how you want to feel, how you want to respond to the situation. Shift the unhelpful beliefs, you know, the ones telling you that you are a loser and shouldn’t make mistakes, you know, all those wonderful things (again, note the sarcasm). Then heal by treating yourself with compassion as you move through the experience.
- Regardless of where you are at in your relationship with money and the abundance you experience, life happens. It is how you feel about it and handle it that changes over time.
What other lessons are you taking from this? Next time life happens, what tools or lessons are you going to apply to the situation?
Share your thoughts and reflections with us @shelbymelissa on Instagram, or in the Money Mindset Shift Community on Facebook! (Link is in the show notes)
And remember, through all of it, you still deserve compassion and care, especially from yourself. ❤️
I’ll see you in the next episode!